Trying to reconcile with what I've done to myself, the confusion and state of mind I've placed myself in for the past 3 years is going to take work and patience.
I was a fully developed person who became fragmented for all the wrong reasons. I can't help but want to invert and just run away from it all at times, the advocacy the people that created the turmoil in the first place, repair is definetly in the making.
I am a strong minded and focused individual, I need to engage in projects and be goal oriented. My health has always been a priority, well in my adult years anyway.
My peace of mind has been compromised and I allowed outside influences to dictate my wellbeing. For now my focus will be to return to a peaceful place, a place were I can continue to evolve as a masculine expression without allowing the politics and needs of others to set in.
Today is Wednesday, I find my workouts are going well, been researching more regarding natural muscle building which is important for my physical and mental health. I don't like to feel vulnerable, and I have allowed myself to be weak.
The time to restore and to build is now, I will get back to who I am, Mark Angelo the fierce male presence whom no one can break or bring down. The Phoenix is rising once again.
I found a new supplement while looking for information on ginseng, its called Suma root. I will report more on it as I take it and report on my progress. I know I may sound selfish right now, but I need this on order to heal and return to me.
Mind, body and spirit are important components that need attention a d balance. Its okay to be focused on self, especially when self was abandoned and broken. I will return stronger than ever.
Till next time
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