Forced Sexuality And Trans Acceptance

Okay, I believe that it is important to allow society to express their views on certain topics and they should have the right to accept or decline certain views, lifestyles, and identities. Although no one should be cruel, hateful, or harmful to anyone, the more a group pushes and forces others to accept them, the more push back and decline they are going to receive.


It is one thing to want to express on the outside on how you feel on the inside, however, it's another to force everyone to validate your identity and expect others to see you as the gender you feel and wish to be. I am guilty of this, for I too wanted to force everyone to see me as the "man" I thought I was, clearly 15 years later and attempting to live the lie, today I can strongly say, that I was misled by a narrative that is false and dangerous. I am a woman, have always been and will always be. I find it quite amusing that most trans individuals really fall for the lie and think they are the gender they transition to. This is where I find a massive problem with, that the trans narrative and the professionals that work with these individuals tell them a lie, and are being deceitful about the whole process. No man can ever be a woman, nor a woman a man, that is just biologically impossible, and frankly very irresponsible to tell someone they can.


Take a look at this video, the trans advocates made quite the fuss regarding the normal reaction to be had when someone gets deceived by a man, pretending to be a woman. Mind you there was no violence involved, and violence should never be condoned, by a normal visceral reaction cannot be contained. For those of you who watched The Crying Game, in the movie when the character of the film finds out that the "woman" he fell for was actually a man, he basically had the same reaction you will see on this video.







I wanted to add, I have been having a discussion on one of a well-known porn star who is a transman called Buck Angel. On his page, he showed discontent when one of his co-workers in the business, Jenna Jameson, was not too happy with the latest Playboy front cover person and had a few things to say about it. I chimed in and expressed my opinion that people are entitled to not accept the trans narrative, and as much as trans people want acceptance and compassion, they need to learn to give it back in return.  Needless to say, I was not very popular with the trans crowd and they, of course, had a few things to say to me. I went digging and found exactly what I have been saying regarding the reason most people transition, in one of a particular trans person's FB page, who claims transition has saved their life and they are better off for it today. I claim BS, that no one is better off, and the only reason they do what they do is to run away from the shame they lived before. Usually the person identifies as a lesbian before transition, although they do not admit it, and the need for power is very evident in trans "men", trans women transition for validation, to run away from the responsibility of being a man, they do a Houdini, an escape act, and many well, in my opinion, see this as one big game and fetishistic behavior.  Although, lots of trans people are dealing with childhood traumas, to include, lack of acceptance for how they present, their personality basically, and since now this has become a thing, well people are being forced into a reparative or corrective therapy in the worse way. Gay is not acceptable for many families especially in the religious sector, so "changing" gender becomes the thing to do.

I don't care how many of them tell me I am wrong, the patterns are so evident and as much as they think that their story is different, there is basically a few patterns of the same behavior. Sexual molestation, trauma during childhood, a very effeminate man, or a very butchy female,  they see the transition as the greatest tool for escape, an alter ego is developed and the rest is history.  After years of transition, the person starts to hear their inner voice that whispers, imposter, and the battle begins. We are going to see massive regrets taking place and I hope the WPATH has a plan to deal with it all, and the numbers of lawsuits that will be rolling in will be colossal.

Anyways, I long for the day, that we can freely express our personalities without saying we are born wrong. I wish to see empowered masculine females unlike what I did, be proud of who they are and have society accept that there are many types of females. I pray that men who are sensitive and outside of the masculine box, learn to feel free to express themselves without thinking they should be a woman. This makes more sense to me than to lead the wounded to slaughter with this crazy and I mean crazy trans agenda.

Till Next Time

Attacks And Haters

If there is one thing I know for sure, when the native get restless, that means, that we are doing something right. When it comes to giving God all the credit and praise, and sharing our miraculous story, we will never shut up, you can count on that, we have through so much as a couple and see to many miracles from him to just remain silent.

We have been attacked from many communities in the past year as we learned our path, and the place we both felt we fit in this world. I like to say for those of you who are so certain of yours, congratulations, but wait a while and you will see what you thought was concrete,  will go crumbling down with the rain which softens and destroys it's base. If there is anything for certain in life, is change. As people evolve and grow, so do their beliefs.  If yours don't, you are the one with the problem, not us.

We have been ridiculed for believing in God, for changing our stances on the Trans agenda and on how feel regarding the LGB community. Our opinions are based on the rule of law, Gods law, one we now take very serious as Christians. If any of you knew me, I was not religious, in fact I use to fight against them, the reason, I did not feel worthy of Gods love and grace. Yet, when I pleaded him for help, he listened, and that my friends is all it took for me to realize that God is there, he is alive and on my side. God loves me, he never stopped loving me, it was the devil that lied to me, tears roll down my eyes as I am writing this, listening to Spanish praise music, while the Lord fills my heart with the Holy Spiritas I share my heart to the world. The beauty of it all is that you too can have his love, you just need to let him in. I promise you, that if you do, things will change, but you have to mean it, you have to want him, he will not push himself upon you.

Getting back to the haters, we now have Lesbians, radical feminists, trans people and trolls hating on our social media, even during our live shows.  We have experienced different level of hate, name calling and oh yes, attempts to throw us of our mission, Gods mission. 

We get private messages on our online transition radio show emails:

"Shame on you both! My name is Tia (Yes, my email address is a pun.) I am a lesbian radical feminist and a Dianic pagan. I remember when you both "dabbled" in radical feminism. I am completely outraged by what you are doing now. Modern gender theory has its problems, but the problems stem from patriarchal belief systems that push men and women into rigid, oppressive social roles.  Furthermore, you both have extremely sexist notions about what it means to be a "man" or "woman." I often dress like Maritza/Mark did during transition. It doesn't make me less female. Clothes are just clothes. Hair is just hair. It doesn't matter. Let people dress however they want to dress.  I know that you are probably "returning" to Christ for the $$$. It is truly pathetic.  You both are snakes that change sides whenever you think the you can make a buck off of it". 

As if we are making or have ever made any money for our shows, everything from the countless hours I spent promoting this community since the inception of Transition Radio TV 2012, where all cost came out of my pocket, including the hours I spent making the website, to our evolution of warning people against the heinous practice of transitioning minors, gender reassignment surgery and the concept that gender can be changed.

After the veils are removed one gets to see how ridiculous it all seems and sounds. I say when you are living in filth, you can't smell it or see it, but once you get clean, you look at those living in it in horror and discuss. God's plan was never meant to rewire your genetics, DNA and Chromosomes, you were born exactly as you are. You were not meant to alter your body.  

1 Corinthians  6:19 
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own.

1 Corinthians  6:20 

for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.

Then we have Lesbians attacking every way possible, to the point they are becoming trolls and stalkers.

Worked with suspicious people

"Sherrie Larch said... These two used the trans community to get attention, they used radical feminists to get attention, they used lesbians and gay men to get attention, they used Facebook friends to get attention (including me) now they are using the religious right to get attention. 

Telling lesbians we need to have a good f@cking by a man for Jesus is completely disgusting and also supporting rape culture and corrective rape. Their channel is a disgusting homophobic shit fest for attention".

Understand this person has mental issues, well known for them, just google her name and the trail of madness speaks for itself. I also think she has had a thing for me, for awhile now, and is pissed off that I am now a man lover, lol. Oh and not to mention, she hates religion as most in the LGBT  community do, and then there are the ones that believe that God accepts them for who they are, and are in total denial of God's laws and rules, so they continue to live in sin, while attending Church and calling themselves Christians.

Imagine the shock and disbelief for those who knew me, to remotely understand that this once Lesbian, then trans man, alpha at that, has now returned to her female roots, and is now a woman of God, submissive to her husband and to the Lord. It may be tough to swallow for many, however if you know my past, and path, you would understand why. It was all empty before, I was searching, but never found truth until now. I had Failed relationships, drug and alcohol abuse, I was empty and broken, but now I know that God is alive, he is all loving and forgiving, he showed me grace and love and he is waiting for you to call upon him.

God saved my life, I now have no worries, I am free, I am grateful and at peace, something I never felt before, as I dealt with all that comes with the LGBT lifestyle, drugs, sex, self loathing, depression, anger, fear, guilt and lack of truth, it all stems from the devil and his lies to you, he promises you a world of fun, but it all comes with a price.  if you don't believe me, just look at those in this lifestyle, it speaks for itself. I should know I lived as a lesbian for 25 years and 13 as a trans man, I have been heavily involved in advocating for both communities, a community I can no longer support, for it failed me and its going against Gods will.

For those that claim that I used these communities, as many are writing on social media, the facts are that the community used me. They had no problem when I was the fierce advocate, promoting their cause, now that I see right through it, I all of a sudden have become their enemy. Well, guess what, we will not be silenced or bullied, as this LGBT agenda tries to force themselves as normal in every house hold via media and their propagandas, enough is enough, God wants you back and the devil will have to stand back.

Till Next Time

Maritza Lopez A Woman of God

In The Dark

I remember when I was a small child, everything revolved around gender and stereotypes. I don't know if anyone else has these memories, but my mother made sure I knew I was a girl and focused on providing me with girl things. I was constantly told how wrong I was whenever I engaged in boy play, boy actions and or fought against girl things. I don't know why I did not gravitate towards girly things, but it was the core of my upbringing, the battle between mom and I lasted a life time and to this day, it still does. 

Even after I have detransitioned, my mom is not seeing the results that she would like to see fast enough. I can see the disapproval in her face and demeanor. I know she means well, and I am sure she meant well through out my life, but I believe her push for me to be the girl she gave birth to, actually led to wanting to be more masculine and fight my feminine essence. I find myself now being drawn to more feminine things and can't wait to be seen as a woman, have my long hair back, be able to wear more feminine attire and over all live the remaining years as a woman. 

I think society is at fault for all the confusion and judgment we all face due to our quirkiness. We should all be able to express, experiment and execute our self as we see fit without judgment or ridicule, including from our own parents.  Add religious dogma  to the mix, that plays on people emotions and fears when they do not fit the perfect little gender boxes, is enough to drive people to the opposite direction. If society was less stressed on peoples expression and accepted everyone for who they were, we would not see all the problems we are seeing today. 

I do see improvements, but we have a long way to go. People and their neurosis with what gender is or what sex is suppose to be are only creating internal battles in others which in turn affects everyone on this planet. I say take a chill pill and let people be already. Who cares if a trans person was born the opposite sex they identify as, is it any of your business? Your uterus won't fall off if a trans woman says she is a woman, don't worry they are not asking you for your ovaries to make them complete. No one is trying to take away your womanhood, there are no quotas on earth for the amount of woman allowed, so breath easy you are safe. There is enough room on this planet for trans women and women alike.

Stop playing the biology card, and start realizing there is more to life the sperm and ovum. Oh and for those who claim that I am standing by my "man", if you even knew me, you would know how much of a ball buster and strong headed individual I am. I have come to this completed 180 due to my own detransition, it has allowed me to feel compassion and have a full on understanding of a feeling of being a woman. You may not understand since you have never had to go through this whole cluster fuck of feelings and emotions, but I can tell you this, your nay saying and constant friction helps no one. You don't even know it but you are hurting women as well. There are many women who are born with lots of androgen, they too will be a victim of harassment in their own toilets. So please give it a break and get out of the darkness. Its 2016 we humans are evolving, you don't want to be seen or left to be a dinosaur.  

Life is too precious and our path very difficult to be a thorn in someone else's path. I love you but remember to love yourselves too

Ritz

PLEASE NOTE I WILL NOT  BE WRITING MY BLOG HERE ANY LONGER, I WILL BE ON MY OTHER WORDPRESS BLOG  https://maritzacummings.wordpress.com

Growth

Everything we ever experience in life stems from the need to grow. We are unaware at the time when the roof seems to be falling on our heads, that the situation which seems horrifying is actually a blessing send from above.  Our pain is our biggest teacher and the times of laughter a time to reflect from our past pain. We are here on this beautiful blue planet to grow, get rid of baggage and over all enjoy the moments provided from our loving creator whom we are connected to in more ways than we know. 

I am not religious in fact, I despise dogma, I feel religion was created to control us and keep us contained in stagnation, fear and confusion. I want to believe that every challenge we face in life, only makes us stronger and teaches us the lessons we are here to learn, making us better people, productive and well rounded in the end. If we don't learn the lesson the first time around, it will continue to show it's ugly head. Just look back at your life, the many times ran into the same situations, no coincidence there. 

Our life and body is like a canvas, there for us to create our masterpiece of life. Don't be afraid to face your demons, for the sooner you accept things, the quicker you learn your lessons and are able to move on. Treat your life like a major Hollywood production, with you and others being actors on a stage. Don't take things to heart or wear your feelings on your sleeves. The things you encounter or the treatment from others is really not just about you, but sometimes it's a collective project for others to learn while you are engaged in their dynamics. I have so much to be thankful for, my journey's and yes I have had many, they have taught me valuable lessons that I will forever hold dear in my heart. I am a better person for it, and now capable of loving beyond measures, something I did not know how to do before. 

Forgiveness is another important player in our lives, we need to start by forgiving ourselves, then others. This is the most freeing tool we can posses as humans. Just take a look at all of the forgiving moments you have had, have you passed the test or are you still holding on to that bag? Remember we are here to grow, to love and to let go. Live in the now, love with all of your might and I hope that you will understand your purpose here on earth, don't think we just come here to live and die, while suffering along the way. There is more to life, are you willing to grow and open up the door? I hope so.

Great Interview with a fellow Detransitioner 

Love you all, but love the heck out of yourself too

Ritz

Happiness Is Yours

We all believe that we will be happy if  and when we obtain a certain materialistic good, achieve a certain look, or receive any of the worldly marker of success, be it a career or a relationship of choice.  But in the end as we go through life chasing our dreams to be "happy, happiness was already in you. Nothing you do or did was actually the precursor of that happiness. 

We join groups whether online or in person that have what we believe are the characteristics that we honor and believe in. But these groups are they really looking out for your best interest? Are they really what you believe in, or is it something that was placed there? It is important to grasp the knowledge of self, to understand you fully. Are you happy because you are, or because someone told you, you would be happy if you obtain these things in life? It's safe to say that many of you really are not aware of your deep needs, inner concepts of self and are just waving someone else's flag, instead of your own.

Most political platforms uses people and their emotions to promote their agendas. Be it religious dogma, a political party, or an idealistic organization promoting hate and separation. If you want to be happy, happiness will not be accomplished by following any of these paths which in the end do nothing more than create problems for the world.

If you want to be happy find your center, go out in nature, create and start a hobby. Help the less fortunate, get in the best shape of your life. Sing, dance and paint. Stop fighting the good fight, just be you and be happy. Never forget that the only way those that control the world win, is by dividing us all, if we unite we win and they lose.

Learn to love everyone and meet them where they are at, one day you might be facing the same hateful witch hunt by a group that thinks what you do  or say is wrong. Create your reality and world, and happiness will be yours for the taking.

Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being defined by positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. A variety of biological, psychological, religious and philosophical approaches have striven to define happiness and identify its sources. ( Or is it?)

Love you all

Ritz 

Love Is All That Matters

Finding self acceptance and understanding that the only constant in life is change may help us evolve and grow in our wisdom. There are many people in the world that are stuck in logistics believing that biology is the only true marker for sex and identity. I use to be one of those people till my detransitioning and awakening took place.  I am detransitioning not because I don't believe that sex is none negotiable, as I use to believe before, but instead because my female side is more powerful and I missed her so. I could have easily continued to live as Mark, I played him very well. But I miss Maritza's gentle smile, her strength of character which was stronger than Marks Alpha appearing nature. Maritza needed to heal and took a back seat, while Mark handled things for the 13 years of my trans experience. 

I believe transition has made me a better person, and I find that I am so much more complete now than ever before. I don't need to fight society or the system to prove who I am, I know now I am that I am. I have learn to love, something Maritza did not know how to do, not even Mark, but through my lived experience and the presence of my angel Lynna, my heart opened up and now all I can feel is love. Unconditional divine love. I  can now feel, when before I was closed and unexpressive. Lynna freed me, showed me how to love in ways I didn't think where possible.

I will fight for her and for all my trans brothers and sisters, dare anyone talk bad or not validate their truth, for I will speak up, I will prove how wrong the nay sayers are. They are simply scared and their fears are creating the divide. Biology is not as concrete as we may think it is, humans have not even began to scratch the surface of the brain, the heart and the soul. 

I still believe people need to be mindful that transition is what they truly want and need. There are lots of complications and concerns to be had. But please be free to be, be love, be present and most of all be kind. For in the end with all the material things we gather and all of the hatred we harbor, the only thing in life that really matters is love.

Love you all

Ritz

RADICAL DESTROYS

My wife wrote on her Face Book wall  a few days ago (and since we have been the target for many rad fems) the meaning of radical and how anything extremes is destructing and divisive. When we bring up the curtains and remove the veil, we actually get to see the truth behind the intent. Let it be known that any movement that may have been started with organic and purest of intent, ends up being perverted by politics and its original meaning lost and ruined. 

Angry people stand behind these movement pushing their own angry filled agenda and hate. Lets take a look at Jesus, he came to show us the way, and told us "we too can do great things than him and that the kingdom of eternity and love is within us, not outside of us". It's not based on what you tithe or how many times you go to church, or if you judge others, (so you don't get to see your own faults). So Christianity, although claimed to be started by or for  Jesus, was actually a tool of politic devise, it is used to push hateful agenda's and to promote a separatist mentality. I know there are good hearted Christians, but the gist of the religion is based on blood shed and control, the follower are taught not to think and have blind faith, they judge others, and feel they are better than everyone else, at least this is what Lynna and I have encountered and I am sure others have too. But we don't hate Christians or wish for them to have separate bathrooms and an island of their own. 

Same thing goes for this Rad Fem movement, started with good intent but instead is now based on venom and hatred against men. I will say, men are responsible for lots of bad things, but women went right along with it, so why put all the blame on one species and see the other as a saint? Women have power, in fact women dominated in years past, just do some research on matriarchal systems in ancient history.  Women are entitled to their privacy from men, but what they don't get is that trans women see themselves as women, they gave up the male card and the same hormones run through their veins as any genetic female. Their hearts feel just the same, so why push them away, to promote the hateful agenda that most Rad fems push?

I stand for women, I stand for men, I stand for trans folks, I stand for everyone in the LGBT community, I mostly stand for love and acceptance for all. Stop pushing your hateful agenda's and for those that say its not hate, they are only protecting women, no you are not, and yes you have hate, deal with truth and find out what makes you feel this hate and please get help. Man hating is not normal, in fact any kind of hating is pathological. 

Two wrongs don't make a right and forgiveness may just save you in the end. Carrying anger and allowing our traumas to dictate our lives only creates further problems and divide. My own anger almost destroyed me, coming from a place of love and understanding feels way better, believe me.

I love you but remember to love yourselves too

Ritz

I See You

Playing with hair pieces and look

Soul searching is one of the most painful self discovery a person can undertake. No amount of therapy in my opinion can fortify you with the deepest discovery of finding you. We go through life building walls, hiding who we truly are in order to protect ourselves, not realizing the damage we are actually creating with in our psyche and mind. 

As a child we learn real quick how to hide our inner truth in the quest of belonging to a group and be seen. We engage in behavior that may not feel comfortable, surround  ourselves with people, habits and careers that may not be at all in alignment with our true intent. So we grow up resentful, angry, fearful and over all unhappy. 

It is important to stay real to our soul purpose, to understand what we are all about, not what others want us to be like. I have learn the hard way, and my path has been painful. I have done things to please others, and to feel like I belong. Creating an image that slowly became angry and full of ego. I can tell you now that feeling was not good, I lived a lie, in order to feel accepted and looked up to. But instead I ended up hurting many people, and I will forever regret my actions, words and disrespect to a community that did not deserve my belittling actions and words. 

We each have a journey to take, maybe mine had a purpose, albeit, I wish I would have been kinder, but I believe now by returning to my truth, I can help heal and mend the damage I created. In addition, help others question their truth and over all create a space where people can talk freely without ego and defensiveness. People are hurting, there are so many reasons for this, but we need to realize that no one pain is more important than another. We all matter. I want to say to all in the LGBT community, to our allies and to those who do not agree with who we are, or  who we try to be, find a space in your heart that allows you to come from a compassionate source, don't point fingers or create a judgment. Instead, reach deep and try to feel the pain of others by simply remembering the pain you have experienced in your life before. Pain is pain, let us learn to see each other through the eyes of love. To all, I want to say that I see me now, and  I can now see you.

I love you but remember to love yourselves too

Ritz

Unconditional Love

We use the world love often and unconsciously, throw it around without any true concept of what Love truly is.  We are taught from a very young age that we are loved if we do what we are told, even our own parents who brought us into this world fail to provide us the gift of unconditional love and that to me is a source of sadness beyond belief. This lack of unconditional love from our safe haven, creates the spiral of our life long relationship problems, including the relationship we have with ourself. 

We come into this world to build not only our bank accounts and ego, but to build our spiritual connection with our higher self and our fellow spirits. Every interaction we have here on earth is not a coincidence, but a carefully planned contract that allows us to work through the many challenges and working that are fortified to us here on planet earth.

When we judge others, we are merely reflecting on something inside of us we don't like. Our relationships are there to help us see inside of self, sort of a mirror image. If you look at your past relationships and notice that we continue to be faced with similar situations it is no coincidence that these relationships are a guide for our growth, till you work things out, you will continue to be presented with the same situations time and time again. I believe in twin flame connections, and I believe that many of us are fortunate enough to be provided the gift of finding our twin. I am thankful to have found mine and ever since, my evolution and growth has sky rocketed in incredible ways, this is how you know you are with your twin, when you are faced with growth and challenges beyond your imagination.  

Keep working on yourself and rid self of judgement and your life will change, you may even get to encounter your true other half. Life is exciting and can be an incredible teacher. Surrender to its lessons and navigate with an open heart and the world will be a kinder place. I have made many mistakes in my life time, but what I have learn from these mistakes is priceless, I would not change a single thing, even my transition, because my transition allowed me to meet my twin and now I am the happiest person alive, navigating the smooth seas with the sun shinning on my face and the world is my canvas, I will paint the images and pictures I wish to see, creating an ever flow of love, abundance, health and peace. I wish you all an amazing journey of learning and gratitude, give unconditional to yourself and others and that love will be fortified in return. Happy loving.....

Hurt

So my new found epiphany of being kinder, nonjudgemental is creating problems amongst some of my once radical feminists friends. They are now saying I am no longer an ally because I empathies with men. Let me say this, I know many see trans women as men, and I am guilty of that in the past, but since being married and in love with a trans woman, I must fortify her the decency of love and understanding, and can see her female energy above her biology. Maybe that is all we need to do, is show these individuals respect, and that we understand their pain and see that they care enough about us, to want to leave their male camps. Why must we find the need to tell them they are not women, I think they know that biologically they are not, and the pain they feel may not allow them to realize what many see as reality. 

I don't understand why I must choose sides, and why I can't have compassion for both, women and trans women. I am sorry the life long battle that has been going on for centuries must continue to be placed in the forefront. I for one find that what we resist will persist, if we continue to focus on what we don't like or want, we will only get more of the same. So, one group feels they are being wiped from the phase of the earth because another group wants recognition, can we not co exist and maybe try to help each other out?

I think that as a species we need to really look at what is going on here, we are going around in circles trying to justify our ideology and force this ideology on others, and no one is listening to another persons needs, instead creating scenarios that hurt everyone, not just women. I want to say that I love women, I am a woman and I will always hold allegiance for my sisters, but I also have allegiance for my spouse and my trans female friends, which I have alienated for a while now by  waving a hate flag. I am sorry I can no longer do that, I want to come from a place of love, compassion and forgiveness. So all I ask is to please respect my views and do not try to shame my new views or pit me against my feminists friends who understand my opinions and new beliefs. People grow, they change and they evolve. I am sorry you feel betrayed, those are not my intentions, I am just being honest and real.   We want to continue to be a beacon of love and light and there is no room for hate. I want to continue to focus on my detransition, I want to continue to spread knowledge to help people understand their struggles, not point them out and judge them for it. As women, our power may lie in our ability to have compassion and be the peace makers, if we wage battle towards others for pushing our own needs, what makes us any better than what we are fighting against. 

I get it, many will read my words and see me now as the enemy and no longer an ally, well I am sorry you feel that way. I can still be an ally without having to carry around the need to want to destroy the opposition.  I am part of the trans umbrella although I am a detransitioner, I can't throw them under the bus because I chose to no longer identify as a trans man, they have a right to live and be. 

Healing The Wounds

My sister and I

This time of year is a very hard time for many of us in the LGBT Community, as well as for those who have lost a love one or are separated from their families, for some reason or another. 

I will be heading to Florida for the holidays, a 30 hour drive, since I am not fond of airplanes, especially during this time of year. I will get to meet my first and only nephew, my younger brother and his wife recently had a baby boy, and I am looking forward to holding him in my arms. I have been pretty estranged from my family since my transition, they have accepted me now, but some how Mark has always felt foreign to my family, it is a weird feeling, as if they weren't my family, I can't really explain it, but the coming home for Christmas will be a healing, a reuniting of sorts, just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I want to tell my mother that she was right, I want to apologize for all the pain I have caused them, and make peace where there was once war.  

I know how important it is for trans individuals to feel family love after their transitioning, but many in the community do not realize that it is not an easy task, that even if they accept you, there is this deep pain that never goes away, we killed the one they loved and replaced it with a stranger.  It takes time, and even after many years, the dynamics are never the same.

I am looking forward to seeing my younger sister who identifies as a lesbian, we were very close before my transition, had a rocky patch afterwards, but then we resumed our relationship, but I am sure it was not the same for her. I appreciated the love she continued to give me as Mark, but I can't wait to hug her and give her, her sister back, something I am sure she longed for.

As I have mentioned before on many of my entries, we are not the only victims here, in fact the victims are our love ones, they are the ones that had no clue as we ripped apart their hearst when we killed the one they love. I know, I know, many don't think so, but this is how I see it, we can't expect people to be onboard with our reality.

Healing is essential for growth and one of the reasons, I believe, we are here on earth, to evolve and grow as spirit beings.  I am looking forward to this Holiday season, to have my family meet Lynna my spouse, and hope the day comes where I can meet her family, everything in due time, patience is an important factor for growth. We are here to evolve, let us not forget that, let us not fall for our own self pity and hurt, step outside of self and be a spectator, then and only then can you see the paradigm you are in, and hopefully learn the lessons you are here to learn. 

I will be taking a sabbatical from blogging, spending time with my family, showing Lynna around South Florida and just enjoying the holidays, I may do a few videos so check in on my  You Tube Channel 

I hope all of you have an amazing Holiday and New Years, I love you, but remember to love yourselves too.

Maritza Cummings

Wrong Body Or Mind?

The whole transgender concept when delving into its deep roots and etiology,  points out to a human psyche issue, based on childhood traumas, neurological impairments and over all lack of self acceptance stemming from religious upbringing or any environment that did not foster self worth and individuality.  It does not take a rocket scientist to break down the factors that created this phenomenon where grown men and women decide that they can change their gender like they change a pair of underwear. Individuality and self expression is not to be mistaken with wrong bodies, its more like societies attempt to normalize individuality by making people conform into a gender box.

When we hear account after account, the narratives all seem the same with a few added or missing factors. But what all these individuals, to include myself, have in common is self hate and lack of self acceptance, creating the illusion that they can swap their sex because they felt different during their younger years, and are not happy with the body they were given. There is nothing wrong with their bodies or genitals, but everything wrong with their thought process and realities.  They lack the capability to understand reality and live their lives emulating a temper tantrum child when they don't hear what they want to hear, or are not allowed to pursue their wishes.

Their lives are based on fun filled adventures, attempting to copy the gender they feel they are, but in the end fail miserably because they are not equipped with the tools needed to be that gender, only creating a character at best, cherry picking the characteristics of the gender they are trying to emulate. They are lacking self awareness and making everyone their target, blaming their lives on others without being able to take responsibility.

What the trans community need is to face the truth, to own their mistakes and issues, to realize that the sex they were given at birth was not an assigned sex, but a sex that they are, the sooner they accept truth and reality, the quicker they will learn and be able to live life in happiness, expressing freely without the needed validation from the world.  This is the secret to my awakening and making peace with who I am. Once I stopped fighting the world, the struggles ended, and I am now able to be free to be me.

For many people detransitioning seems to be harder than the original route of transitioning and I expected a lot more complications and mental distress than I have been going through. In fact, it has been smooth sailing on my part, the initial awkwardness with Lynna lasted a few days and we have since been great.

I believe that the secret to my success is owning my past journey and not allowing guilt, remorse, frustration or anger into the picture.  I own my past, the path I chose, and now its time to take a different turn. I enjoyed the past 13 years, learn so much from my transition and now I am ready to put all into perspective and grow. Initially I had problems with my look, dealing with letting go of the egotistical creation, putting it aside and letting my true self shine. Sometimes we create characters to help deal with the pain from childhood traumas, and challenges we face as adults, as long as we know and realize that, that is all it is, then we can move on in a healthy fashion. My advise to all of you, do not get too attached to your new self, and don't forget who you really are, it will keep you healthier in the end. If you let it, your new self will try to kill the old and it will destroy you in ways you never thought imaginable.

It is your journey and your path, it was created to help you heal, don't loose sight of that and you will be just fine.  Don't abandon all your other loves and interest and make this new creation the center of your world, it will take over and that is not at all good. Be aware of what you are doing, if this creation is to be your therapy, make sure that it is serving its purpose and not creating more problems for you. Don't find yourself putting all your eggs in one basket and thinking that this is going to solve all of your problems, it will not, in fact it can create even more. Just stay balanced and aware.

Here is the beginning of my vlogging series

Stopping T Improves Health

http://www.eulogia.org/the-dangers-of-testosterone-therapy/

Two of the many side affects that I noticed with T, was an increase in heart rate and blood pressure, two of the most damaging results that can lead to stroke, heart attacks and death. Since stopping T, my usual pulse of 98-102, placing tremendous strain on my heart, has now dropped to 84 with only 4 weeks off T. My Blood pressure which I have kept under control while on T by using Hawthorn Berries supplementation, ranged from  124/92- 128/89, and now its 103 /73 a remarkable drop in such a short period of time. If I would have continued to be on T, I would surely have died from a stroke or massive heart attack, the strain I placed on my heart was enormous and all for what?

Now if we break down the many dangerous effects that cross sex hormones have on trans individuals, it makes sense not to take them. First of all if your body was meant to have synthetic hormones from your opposite sex, you would have been born the gender you so desperately want to be. Instead you are "forced" to take a substance that is not meant for your body or receptors, according to your chromosomes and DNA, this only creates health issues that are clearly noted, such as increase in heart disease, cancer, blood clots that lead to stroke and heart attacks, liver and kidney damage, brain damage and more. Why put your body in danger in attempts to alter your gender, while your sex remains the same?

Could you not as easy live life expressing as you wish without having to cater to societies needs of gender boxing? Do you not care enough about yourself and health to forgo such crazy practices? Are you that superficial that you base your life on looks and presentation based on a system that creates these situations to profit from? I know I fell for the trap and only wish I could turn back time, but since I can't the only sane thing for me to do is help others understand that there are other ways of living your truth. You need to start by loving yourself unconditionally, stop obsessing over the physical and work on the inner you, the one that really needs all of your attention.

I plan to not take any hormones at all, although I have no ovaries to produce my natural dose of estrogen, I will simply continue my healthy lifestyle of eating plant based products, drinking lots of water, exercising and meditating. I hope to be an inspiration to many young women who are being sold the lie, that their bodies are imperfect and that they need to be someone they are not. Till next time....

Facing Truth

One of the things that frustrates me the most about this community is the lack of self awareness and ability to reason with truth. I can understand not liking the body you were giving, the gender you were pronounced at birth, but just because you don’t like it or want it, does not give you the right to negate it. You can alter yourself all you want, heck pay a doctor enough and he will attach horns on your head and you can call yourself the devil if you like, but please, please, have some sort of reality check and realize that you are not the opposite gender you were born as, no matter what procedure you get.

I believe many of these individuals really believe in their minds and hearts that they are the opposite gender they were born as, and the actual medical "professionals" who are enabling these individuals are not helping them in the least.  In fact, they are creating monsters, instead of placing a sense of reality on these folks.  The notion is that they can be who they want to be and dare anyone question or challenge their beliefs, and here is where the pathology begins. Its not that you like to wear dresses, make up and heels if you were born a man, its the notion that you can change your sex and expect everyone to bow down to your wishes and fantasies. Shaming real women, forcing men to date them and visa versa. 

The lack of self awareness is where the danger stems and in the end when the walls come crashing down, these individuals end up committing suicide, and or living a life of deep depression even after all they did. No procedure can ever change your biology, nothing that you can do will ever make you a real boy or girl, you are the sex you were born as and the sooner you accept this, the happier you will be.

Detransition progress is going well, I am feeling more and more at peace with me, and can't ever believe I allowed myself to think I could change my gender or be happy with the change. The consciousness always prevails and we can't escape our inner voice, not for long anyways. In fact, I am excited to see what lies ahead, and to be able to be a beacon a light for others who have also fallen prey for th trans agenda, letting them know that they can be themselves without hurting their bodies, their love ones and their future, because there is no future in this endeavor, it only brings destruction, unless you are one of the lucky ones who has been chosen to be a soldier for the cause. The ones they are using now to lure everyone in, promising them fame and fortune, and all the attention money can buy, but this fame and fortune will not last forever, for once they achieve what they want, they will drop you like a lead balloon.  

Let's stand up for what really counts, allowing our future gender variant kids, teens and adults to be happy with their bodies and life, let us teach acceptance, let us change the way society looks at gender norms and make this world a safer place for us all, instead of promoting the medicalization of gender and quick fix that will lead to a quicker death. Till next time...

Stop The Madness Please

I spent a lot of time having to put out fires, explaining things to people and trying to express my core beliefs and views. First of all I want to say, I don't want any harm to come to anyone in the trans community, nor do I want any rights taken away, and especially not have their medical access removed. What I do want is people to wake up and realize the truth. Yes the truth, not my truth but the universal truth that says we are not a mistake, our bodies are not wrong, our brains are not gendered, in fact here is the latest study that proves that we all have bits and pieces of male and female components in our brains, not one gendered glob of delusion. http://www.latimes.com/science/sciencenow/la-sci-sn-no-male-female-brain-20151130-story.html

People are born with all sorts of different corks and differences, some men love to wear dresses, some more than others. Some men were de-masculinized while growing up and are dealing with all sorts of skeletons in their closet. It's hard I know, it sucks, but the reality is everyone has issues and problems they are dealing with and the world is not making concessions for them, they just live. I truly believe that the real issues here are childhood traumas that are showing their ugly heads as gender dysphoria, it feel nice to run away and be another person, or should I say gender. Yeah its great to start life over and leave everything and everyone behind, kind of like a witness protection program when they change your identity and move you away to a new place never to be found, but unfortunately we can't run from our true sex, no way, uh uh.. 

Whether you were told to man up, or act like a lady when growing up because you didn't fit into the gender box you were born in, doesn't give you the free range to switch your gender, even the doc who operated you knows he only performed a cosmetic procedure that really doesn't function as the sex organ you wished to have. 

People need to start facing their challenges, be truthful and stop living a lie, this community has gotten so bizarre that they are actually believing their BS.

The time to come to grips with this disorder is now before we literally turn the earth upside down. There are no objective findings to believe the trans plight of being born in the wrong body is true only subjective feelings from a person. Harry Benjamin created this night mare by allowing a few to have SRS, because he felt sorry for them, and could not change the way they thought, these individuals where actually intersex who rightfully had a plight, but trans folks are just confused individuals who need help yes, but not the kind they are getting. 

I know I am harsh in what I say, but I know that happiness does to come by changing gender, it gives you a bit of relief, because what is actually happening is, for the first time in your life you are being allowed to express your other side, to play, wear dresses, see your creation in the mirror, but once the fun ends, reality kicks in and you have to clean up one hell of a mess. Till next time...

check this out : http://frontier-heart.tumblr.com/search/trans+women+are+bio+female