We took a few days away from social media, did not have a show this week and decided to take some time to reflect on our life and changes, after all, it has been one heck of a ride since the day Paul entered my life on that cold winter day, in El Paso Texas, in the ICU ward, January 1, 2015. We have been through so much ever since, trying to make sense of our life, changes, and where we fit in the scheme of things, and yes bringing God into our lives. Paul and I are very intense people, passionate, all or nothing kind of people, motivated by impulse and tend to be a bit dramatic in our actions. We are definitely made for each other in every sense of the word.
During this reflection period, we came to the conclusion that the type of woman that I am is definitely not your typical feminine or docile female, I am alpha, masculine, opinionated, rough around the edges, yet kind, loving, nurturing, caring and with one big heart that belongs to my Paul, and God of course. I have never been one to fit into society, nor have I ever been a follower, I am a leader, strong, bullheaded and passionate, very passionate. I have come to accept who I am, I have no need to keep running or pretend to be something I am not. I Maritza Lopez, am quite the individual with some battle scars to show the wars I have engaged in. I am bald, have facial and body hair, a deep voice, strong mannerisms and an overall strong presence. I love to lift weights, eat healthy, write songs, cook, create and love. I am a teacher, a student, a wife, yes I take on the role of husband from time to time, I have had to adapt to my man, and my man is oh so special. He is sensitive, kind, loving, a little boy who still needs to be held, told he is beautiful as well as handsome, since when is it wrong for men to be beautiful or a woman to be handsome? Why must we create these stereotypes that lead people to engage in activities that will hurt them, confuse them and create further problems? We are all made to specs by God, who are we to question his creation. I believe there is someone for everyone out there. God made Paul for me, and I for Paul. We fit, we work and who dares say that who we are is wrong? We are a redeemed couple who at one point thought God made us wrong that we had to alter our bodies to be something we were not, we now know who we are, and let me tell you, what a relief it is, I for the first time in my life, feel free and life makes sense.
Paul and I are so excited about our life and so very grateful to God for helping us sort things out. In all of this reflection period, I did some research regarding women who are born with endocrinological problems and found so many interesting things. There are women who live with beards since puberty, after failure to remove the relentless hairs from face and body they learn to embrace who they are.
http://people.com/bodies/woman-decides-to-let-her-beard-grow-freely-after-26-years-of-shaving/
http://www.freakingnews.com/Bearded-Women-Pictures--3691-0.asp
Our ministery is to help people accept who they are without altering their bodies or defaming the gender God gave them. We are here to help spread unconditional love and acceptance under God's laws, be like Jesus, showing compassion, love and understanding. Let us all be like Christ, who came here to rid heresy, not to condem those who deal with their own cross, let us help people come to Christ, not push them further away.
Till Next Time
Maritza Lopez
2 comments:
ok, I took a couple of days to reflect on this prior to commenting. I see that you moderate your comments - so I hope that you'll be transparent enough to allow it to be seen, because I am not attacking yours or your husband for your choices at all. It isn't an attack in any way shape or form. But my issue is this: and I take this same issue with other known trans detractors. I absolutely stand by your right to choose your path in life. None of us should be told how to inhabit our bodies, how we are supposed to look, act, talk, dress, etc. And that goes both ways. I think it's absolutely reprehensible that you are being attacked and/or ridiculed for yours and Paul's decision to de-transition and live a christian life. That is absolutely your right, and your call to make. Whether you transition and de-transition time and time again - that would be your right and your call. But you don't have to ridicule and denounce people who are on a different path than you are, and insinuate that those who believe and live differently than you are somehow mistaken, or sick, or secretly miserable and lost. That just isn't a factual statement to make, and broad generalizations hurt others. For example, I think - personally, that religion is man made and that while there may be some energy greater than me, it is not the biblical god. But that is MY belief and how I choose to live my life. I don't have the right to say that god doesn't exist for me, therefore you are wrong to believe. That is what the two of you are doing to the trans community. We had this conversation before and you retracted some of what you were saying, both of you apologized for attacking the trans community but now I see that you're right back to the generalizations and negative attitudes regarding trans people and whether we can truly be happy. I am here to tell you that 19 years into transition, 14 years into my marriage and 4 wonderful kids later, I am indeed living the life I want to and feel great about the path I'm on. Whether you believe me or not isn't important to me, I just want to encourage you to open your minds and be better people - and better christians - by allowing others the very freedom to make life choices that you want for yourselves. Just because it wasn't right for you doesn't mean it isn't right. I fully support you in your endeavors otherwise, and am glad you've both found peace. It should just appear more authentic if you weren't tearing others down to prove a point. That is quite counter productive to your statements about having found true happiness. True happiness and peace don't require denouncing others.
Michael, this is an older blog entry, Lynna and I have been going through a lot in the past 2 years, lots of it has to do with her family, especially kids, the reason we attempted to detransition in the first place. I have not kept up this particular blog, but I suggest you go to my word press blog where I have more up to date information. https://maritzacummings.wordpress.com/.
I had never even considered de-transitioning, until Lynna, to assist with the perception of her kids, mother and religious family. I personally am Spiritual and do not care for religion, and got engulfed in the whole thing, but thankfully, got out just as quickly as I entered it. Anyways, I appreciate the comment, and no doubt there are people who are happy in the community, but there are many who are not. I am not the one to judge who is or who is not, things got out of hand, and we said things that should best have been kept silent.
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